𝙻𝚘𝚗𝚐𝙼𝚊𝚌𝚃𝚘𝚙𝚙𝚎𝚍𝚄𝚙

The mainstream apps owned by match group as well as bumble appear to have a lot of people like you describe. I am sure there are decent people on there also, it’s just the signal to noise ratio sucks, as well as the whole gamified bullshit of the apps themselves. I uninstalled Tinder/hinge/bumble not long after trying them and I have no plans to return. I suspect people who would put up with the way tinder functions are the same people who would put up with forced ads on their phone and smart tv etc. I would not be a good fit for people like that.

I’ve had a lot of success on less mainstream apps by simply being honest about what I’m looking for (ENM / casual ongoing) and have found many with the same views.

Glad it worked out for you.

But I can’t help but wonder what if when you met in person it wasn’t what you were expecting?

Would it have felt like a waste of texting effort?

Relatively new to dating via apps as an elder millennial freed from a life time of monogamy. (Only been at it 6 months)

Who are these people who want to go on a first date that involves being in a situation like a restaurant?

Seems like with apps people skip the whole courting thing and jump straight in to something that should only be for once you get to know each other a bit better.

For me, first meeting is a coffee or a drink at a well populated cafe or bar. Maybe a walk after somewhere busy in the city.

Maybe I’m just old and out of touch.